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The Last Crash of the Sunchaser!/Transcript
Transcript Launchpad: C'mon! All set! Webby: Next stop, Monacrow! Huey: Home to Excess, the extreme consumer electronics and science emporium. Experimental racecars! Webby: Lasers! Launchpad: Aeroplanes? Dewey: You bet old friend Scrooge: And Monacrow is said to be the final resting place of the elusive Maltese MacGuffin. Lost during Netherworld War II, his ephemeral heirloom is so rare that no one has ever laid eyes upon it. Huey: Whoa, so what is it exactly? Scrooge: The stuff dreams are made of! Huey: No, but, l...like is it a statue or...?? Come on Uncle Donald, you can fix the houseboat when we get back. Donald: Uh-uh, I'm almost done. We'll be on the water again in two days! Seven days. Sigh... I should get started Dewey: No rush! Webby: Granny! You're coming too? Mrs. Beakley: I have 987 vacation days saved up, and Monaco's black water beaches are legendary. It's high time I wild it out, with some 'maxing, and relaxing. Hm? Webby: I have the coolest grandma! Dewey: Sure. Now who's ready for the Huey, Dewey, Louie, and Scrooge: best vacation ever! Huey: Aw, you'll get it Scrooge: Six months ago, if you'd have told me I should take in a group of youngins... Mrs. Beakley: I did. Scrooge: ...I woulda called you daft. But I tell ya I haven't felt this energized '''and '''vital since... well a long time. Load up everyone! Louie: Psst, psst hey. Dewey: Did ya get it? Louie nods, tapping the bag Scrooge: Come on kids! TO OUR GREATEST ADVENTURE YET! Everyone: WOO HOO! TO ADVENTURE! -theme song plays- Launchpad: Sorry Mrs B, only seat I could find. Mrs. Beakley: Seatbelts? Launchpad: Oh, umm... -grabs an inflatable tube- When we crash it can be used as a flotation device. Mrs. Beakley: When we crash? Scrooge: Long time since you've been in the field, ey Agent 22? Mrs. Beakley: And this plane would have been dangerously outdated even then. I'm counting 1.. 2...3..4... fourteen safety violations. Launchpad: Aw come on. Every time the Sunchaser goes down, she always gets right back up in the air! Mrs. Beakley: Everytime? I allow the children to travel with you because I assume you're keeping them safe. Scrooge: Actions! Launchpad give the old bird the tour of the old bird to show her there's nothing to worry about. I'll take the wheel-stick... thingy...? Mrs. Beakley: Sorry, when did you learn how to fly a massive cargo plane? Scrooge: Please, I'm Scrooge McDuck! If Launchpad can do it, how hard can it be? Launchpad: Not very! The tour starts down at the tummy of the plane. Let me know if this gets too technical... Louie: I sweettalked Quackfaster down at Scrooge's secret archives. That lady is *nuts*! And I got her to give us this. Huey: Start at the corners and work inward Webby: No Huey, each mysterious piece hold a secret. Listen closely and they tell you where they go. Huey: It goes there. Dewey: Okay, so what do we got? Louie: The documents shredded the week we were born. According to the note we found in Castle McDuck, that date is connected to... Webby: ...the Spear of Selene, the mysterious unknown thing your mom took from Scrooge. Huey: Somewhere in these pieces are the answers Scrooge doesn't want us to find. What is the Spear of Selene? Why didn't Scrooge and Donald talk for years? Dewey: What happened to our mom? Nothing can stop us... OH, COME ON! Where's the last piece?! It's gotta be here somewhere! Webby: (gasps) There! Dewey: Aha! Nothing can stop us (crosstalk between Huey, Louie, and Webby) (The plane jerks to a halt) Dewey: WHERE'D IT GO?! Mrs. Beakley: What just happened? Where are the children? Huey: Quick! If they find out we're researching his darkest secret, Scrooge will shut down our investigation for good! Huey, Dewey, and Louie whistle Mrs. Beakley: Are you children alright? Webby: Inconspicuous whistling... just a casual whistleeee Scrooge: Augh you anti-aeronautical patchwork contraption! Will ya FLY ALREADY?! Mrs. Beakley: McDuck! I leave you alone for two minutes and you crash the plane! Launchpad: If we crashed, then why are we still in the air? Everyone gasps Mrs. Beakley: Of all the irresponsible... Launchpad: Not even a real crash.... Scrooge: Ah quit your heatherin(?), it's just a teeny 10,000-meter speedbump. I'll have us safely on the trail of the Maltese MacGuffin by morning or my name isn't Scrooge Mc... Mrs. Beakley: And you've blown out an engine Scrooge: Ah, that happens all the time! Right Launchpad? Launchpad: ...Yes. But usually I crash like two seconds later. Mrs. Beakley: We have to get out and figure out how we get down Scrooge: And pass up the adventure of a lifetime?! Mrs. Beakley: And risk all our lives?! Scrooge: Ah your safest houses, this is nothin! The plane could be on fire! Or''' we''' could be on fire! Or this could be a volcano! EVERYTHING could be on fire! Mrs. Beakley: This is a blatant breech of training protocol AND just basic safety precautions! Is this what you're doing when you take the family on road trips?! Scrooge: Ah you're overreacting! Mrs. Beakley: I have no idea why you thought this would be a good idea Scrooge: You're a hysteric. Honestly... Launchpad: We've seemed to have hit some... um... turbulence in the cockpit here. Everything’s fine! Please enjoy our inflight entertainment. (inaudible arguing while Launchpad is talking) -Darkwing Duck credits theme plays- Huey: Now what? Dewey: NOW THAT! Scrooge: I'll use the Jeep's engine to jumpstart the Sunchaser's propeller and we'll be on our way! What could be safer? Mrs. Beakley: Calling for help? Climbing down on our own? Not starting a car inside of a plane! Webby: We've got to get that piece without anyone noticing. We'll need some kind of distraction. Louie: Ugh, fine. Follow my lead. Launchpad: All set up here, mister McDee! Scrooge: See here Bentina, I have taken the children on countless adventures and they have never once caused a worry about their safety. Louie: (acting concerned) Uncle Scrooge! We're worried about our safety! Scrooge: N..now Louie I have always a looked out for you. Why worry now? At such an embarrassing moment for me? Louie: I know we've been in tough spots before but this one seems reeaally '''tough. Huey: He's right. Given the altitude, the condition of the plane, the weather patterns, we have a one in 17 million chance of surviving Louie: (actually worried) Wait really?! (trying to keep his composure) I mean yeah, scaary'! Webby: And usually on our expeditions there's usually some kind of curse or villian that you can outwit. But you can't outwit gravity! Louie: Yeah! Y...yeah yeah t...that's right! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! WE'RE WORRIED ABOUT OUR SAFETY WE GOTTA GO NOW NOW NOW!! Launchpad: Now? Scrooge: NO! Dewey: No! Launchpad: Huh, never crashed a Jeep in a plane before. '''Into' a plane, sure. But... Hm?? Scrooge: Launchpad! You need to counterbalance the plane! Everyone to the front! Mrs. Beakley: Ughh, go go go! What is... in here?? Triplets and Webby: Nothing! Launchpad: Uhh, mister McDee? Scrooge: Gah, Beakly secure the hatch! Launchpad: Thanks, mister McDee! Scrooge: Nothing bad will happen when Scrooge McDuck is around! Mrs. Beakley: Mr McDuck! Scrooge: Kids! Louie: Mrs. Beakley! ...Sorry I thought I could keep the blame circle going. (nervous laugh) Scrooge: Must you blindly galivant around with no clue what you're doing?! Mrs. Beakley: Mmhmm irony Scrooge: If you canny listen, I can't keep you safe! Except of course I can because I am Scrooge McDuck and I am very good at what I do. From here on out you have to *stay put*! -commercial break- Dewey: There's the missing piece! We just have to get it! Louie: Nope! Nuh-uh! Nothing is getting me out of this seat! Huey: What if the plane catches fire and we have to evacuate? Dewey: Come on, that puzzle piece may be our best chance to find out why Della disappeared! Webby: Maybe? Dewey: Beg your pardon? Webby: It's just, you said in the archives, and on Ithaquack, and how can we know for sure? Dewey: By grabbing the piece! Guys this is the greatest mystery of our lives! Louie: We can't solve it if we're dead! Dewey: We'll be fine. Scrooge won't let anything bad happen to us. Scrooge: Stop. Moving! Dewey: Ugh, see! Louie: This couldn't get any worse! Launchpad: This is your captain. To take your minds off of our potentially grim fate, please enjoy an action packed Darkwing Duck video! ...Huh, the tape player seems to have been damaged in the crash. Enjoy! Webby, Dewey, and Huey groan Launchpad: Here are those dirty laundry bags you wanted, mister McDee. Mrs. Beakley: Launchpad, these are parachutes Launchpad: They're what-now? Mrs. Beakley: Ugh, mister McDuck. Mister McDuck. Scrooge! Scrooge: What? All I have to do is climb ou' on the wing to jumpstart the propeller myself. Using these heavy parachutes as counterbalance out the other side of the plane. Mrs. Beakley: Leaving us with no emergency equipment! Please, for the safety of your family admit you cannot fix this. Scrooge: Nonsense, nothing bad is gonna happen to her Her who? Scrooge: (suprised) Hm? Uh, the kids. They'll be thanking us by the time we land. Launchpad, hand me another parachute. ...Launchpad! ...Besides the kids are having the times of their lives! All except Dewey sing along Dewey: Ugh I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE I'M GOING FOR IT! Huey: DEWEY NO! (over walkie-talkie) Junior Woodchuck Rule 18: Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Webby: I thought that was Newton? Huey: Where do you think he got it from? Webby: Science? ...Okay I'll call out the steps! Got it? Dewey: Got it! Louie: Nope bad idea! Terrible idea! Dewey: For mom. Webby: Ready... steady... Dewey left step step, Huey right step step. Dewey right Huey left. Mrs. Beakley: Please we all believe you are a very capable adventurer, alright? Scrooge: Stand down 22, I am still your boss. Launchpad now! Dewey: The truth about Della Duck! Nothing can stop us... Webby: (over walkie-talkie) Walk with the stupid paper already! Mrs. Beakley: Dewey? Scrooge: What the blazes? ...What have you got there? Dewey: Nooooooot secrets! Louie: (over walkie-talkie) Literally the worst answer you could have given... Scrooge: Give it here... (both gasp) Dewey: NO! Scrooge: Get back here, you'll get yourself killed! Mrs. Beakley: Both of you, stop speeding through the plane! Ugh that is not what I meant and you know it Dewey: Leave me alone! Come back here this instant! Mrs. Beakley: You three, come to balance the weight! Scrooge: I'm trying to save your life, now come back here or I will end it young man! Dewey: No! So close! Mrs. Beakley: (gasps) Webby: Oh no Mrs. Beakley: Oh children... What have you been up to? -paper flies out of the plane- Scrooge gasps Huey, Louie, Webby Mrs. Beakley, Launchpad: DEWEY! Scrooge: NO!! LAD! LAD GIVE ME YOUR HAND! No, not again. Webby: (over walkie talkie) Dewey, this is crazy! The mystery is not worth it! Louie: (over walkie talkie) I..I get it but you can't give up the rest of us to find the one person we lost! Launchpad: (over walkie talkie) Dewey, the Darkwing Duck video is still running! Do you want me to pause it until you get back? Huey: (over walkie talkie) Gimme that! Dewey, our family is amazing! We're enough, let it go! Dewey gasps Scrooge: (sighs) Please, I...I can't keep you save alright? How can I get you to listen to me? Dewey: Tell me about the Spear of Selene. Scrooge: (sighs) It was just before you were hatched. (Flashbacks are shown, such as Scrooge, Della and Donald on a boat in a jungle, flying away from a volcano, underwater) Your mother, your Uncle Donald, and I had been going on *amazing* adventures for years. And things were grand! (another flashback of the old trio marking a map) Except... we've been just about everywhere. Ever the aviator, your mother devised a plan to explore the greatest uncharted territory of all... outer space! Triplets gasp Scrooge: (another flashback, Della is designing blueprints for the Spear of Selene rocket as well a map of the stars) Della had already been over the Earth, she wanted to give you boys the stars. (Donald and Della are inaudibly arguing while Scrooge looks at the blueprints) Donald thought it was too risky, especially with you three on the way. So, I did the only logical thing: (Scrooge sets up the Spear of Selene rocket and prepares a photo) I built the rocket and didn't tell Donald! Or anyone. It was meant as a surprise for Della to celebrate your birth, (Della also happens to be in the photo sneaking into the rocket) but your mother was always good at sniffing out surprises. (Scrooge finds a note reading "Scrooge, I've taken the Spear of Selene. I'm sorry, Della" just as the rocket lifts off) She found the rocket and decided to go on a little test run in orbit. Neither of us could have predicted, that cosmic storm. But we both knew a little bit of pan-galactic precipitation wouldn't stop her, after all she was Della Duck! Curse me kilts was that girl stubborn. I tried to talk her through it, I thought if anyone could make it, it was her. Until that very last bolt. I couldn't keep her safe, the rocket and your mother were lost to the inky abyss of space. Your Uncle Donald and I never spoke again until you three showed up on my doorstep. Louie and Huey sob Dewey: Cool, so''' you're''' the reason our mom is gone! Scrooge: What? No! I..I Launchpad: Um, guys? Dewey: You built her a crazy dangerous super rocket! Scrooge: Which she stole early! Huey: Then you encouraged her to keep flying in a cosmic storm? You could have called her down, there were too many variables! Mrs. Beakley: Now boys, you don't know.... Louie: And you're the richest duck in the world! Why didn't you send up more ships to look for her? Scrooge: I spared no expense! Dewey: Yeah, right. Cheap old Scrooge probably bailed as soon as it put a dent in his money bin. Launchpad: Um, guys? Webby: Take it easy Dewey, he may have a point. Even if gifting an experimental rocket to a mother of three was clearly a terrible idea! Scrooge: This is a family matter!' You '''are' not''' family! Mrs. Beakley: See here McDuck. You will not speak to my granddaughter that way. Scrooge:' You' will not speak to me that way! None of you! After everything I do for you, you're all nothing but trouble! Launchpad: Guys! This is your captain speaking, we are FALLING! Everyone else: WAIT WHAT? (scream) Launchpad: Huh, that was weird. (crashes) Phew, there we go! Donald: Back so soon? Well, tada! She's all done! ... Uhh, what happened to you? Dewey: We know about the Spear of Selene. Donald: Oh. Louie: Oh let's go back to the marina. Webby: Isn't he even gonna say goodbye? Mrs. Beakley: We're taking those vacation days, if that's alright with you, sir. Scrooge: Fine. Mrs. Beakley: Well you've successfully pushed away your family and everyone who cared about you away, again. I hope you're happy. -flashbacks- Louie: You're the richest duck in the world! Why didn't you send up more ships to look for her? Huey: Then you encouraged her to keep flying in a cosmic storm? You could have called her down, there were too many variables! Dewey: So '''you're '''the reason our mom is gone! Cheap old Scrooge probably bailed as soon as it put a dent in his money bin. Mrs. Beakley: Well you've successfully pushed away your family and everyone who cared about you away, again. I hope you're happy. Scrooge: ...I am. Category:Transcripts Category:Article stubs